We eat more than we grow
The global supply of grain is under more pressure now than at any previous time over the last half-century. The likelihood of malnutrition and food riots happening in various parts of the world will massively increase over the next two years.
The human race has been consuming more than it produces for five years now. It doesn’t take a genius or scientist to know that this situation can’t—and won’t—continue. The outlook for the human race only worsens when you consider that land is increasingly being turned over to biofuels production instead of food crops. This not only affects humans but the diversity of plants and animals that will be pushed out of their natural habitats so that the ground can be prepared for fuel crops.
tags: climate change, economics, environment, food, green issues, healthGovernment to consider banning everything it doesn’t like
Cigarette vending machines and tanning salons could be banned by the government to try to reduce the incidence of cancer in Britain, it has been announced today. Proposals on decreasing the general levels of stupidity among the orange-skinned population, by increasing emphasis on education at all levels and banning the use of nylon in the production of sport and leisure wear, were dismissed.
Sources within government (okay, one of the tea ladies in the House of Commons) suggested that such measures would be unlikely to reduce cancer because chavs infamously smoke like chimneys. It was also feared that the profit margins of cosmetic enhancement clinics and factory shops would be severely reduced to such an extent that the British economy, now founded on cheap knock-offs, would collapse.
tags: cancer, food, health, humour, prohibition
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