Prime Minister bends over, pleads with banks to be gentle
Prime Minister Gordon Brown has announced that the government has met with the banks to beg them to pass on this week’s three per cent cut in interest rates to their customers. The banks recently formed a coalition known as CUNTT (Corporates Unitedly Nonchalant about Troubled Times) to more effectively get across their shared vision for world recovery, which involves a “rebalancing” leading to there being far fewer rich people (but richer than they were before) and far more poor people. CUNTT was unimpressed by the PM’s overtures today. “It was when he bent over and touched his toes, that’s what did me in,” said one chief executive. “That hairy arse, it might have been willing but there’s no way I was. Turned my stomach, it did.”
tags: bank charges, banking, banks, bastards, capitalism, corruption, credit crunch, greed, humour, immorality, moralityCard transactions taking longer to process
Is it just me and mine, or has anyone else noticed that the banking system seems to be moving slower for ordinary consumers? Debit card payments, we’ve noticed, are taking longer to leave our bank accounts than they used to, which can result in nasty miscalculations when checking your balance several days after using your card.
tags: banking, charges, credit crunch, direct debits, greed, transactions
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