The sour joke that is Disability Living Allowance

I’ve had a letter rejecting me for all components of Disability Living Allowance. I now have to go back to see the nice chap at the Citizens Advice Bureau, and lodge an appeal. Again, the premise outlined in the letter seems to be that you only get it if you have no arms, no legs, cannot feed yourself, clothe yourself, or anything else. Not having a head is also helpful. People in comas on life support can’t apply, so I guess this approach saves a lot of money that can be better spent on blowing up Iraqi civilians.

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Wednesday, July 2nd, 2008

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A man who chose 'Lloyds is pants' as his telephone banking password found it changed to 'no it's not' by a Lloyds TSB member of staff. His alternative proposals of 'Lloyds is rubbish', 'Barclays is better' and 'censorship' were all refused. The man is still trying to find a password acceptable to the bank, although it has apologised. Could the bank look any more pathetic right now?

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Eighteen sailors aboard a Royal Navy warship have tested positive for cocaine. All the world is said to love a sailor, but I've personally never found large nostrils (or an interest in cocaine) attractive in any man, even if he wears a lovely uniform!

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